Tales From Normal, Mn.--FICTION

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Tales from Normal, Mn. Headline News---FICTION

Friday, June 27, 2014

Foreign Nation decides to fly armed drones in USA to protect its foreign exchange students:

Just got the tweet...seems that foreign countries are pretty impressed with the action of the USA to fly drones over Iraq to protect the 75 or so US soldiers on the ground...so the foreign nations are beginning to fly armed drones over the USA to protect their interests and of course also the foreign exchange students studying here...after all they want to imitate the actions of our great country to show how good learners they have become....stay tuned.

Thursday, June 26, 2014

Politicians promise to mend all wrongs, return to golden age: Tales From Normal, Mn: FICTION

Just got the tweet..seems that the politicians from the frozen tundra have promised, if elected, to repair all the wrongs, replace all the lost income in the past seven years, turn water into wine, and still have wonderful economic development and jobs for everyone....nice...

Church Leader cuts off Mob: Local bishops are silent...still hoping for contributions: Tales From Normal, Mn.: FICTION

Just got the tweet...a courageous church leader has called out the Mob for their criminal activity and cut them off from the Church...and the individual faithful, the regular church goers on a daily basis have cheered...the local parish priests have also cheered but their superiors, the bishops have just stayed clam faced and are still hoping for some donations to come their way...stay tuned...

Conservative Politicians decide to Sue Everybody: Tales From Normal, Mn: FICTION

Just got the tweet...the head of the Conservative politicians of Washington, DC has announced that in frustration with not getting his way, he plans on suing all branches of government and all elected officials for not doing their duty to follow his instructions and vote as he has indicated....I would think since all the defendants are lawyers anyway, they will get the message that he is conveying...stay tuned as I follow this story...

Monday, June 23, 2014

Retail and Home Sales Plunge---folks optimistic: Tales from Normal, Mn: FICTION

Just got the tweet...it is the home selling time of the year and yet home sales are down...and retail sales are down too...but...the pundits are still smiley faced...gun sales are up....nice.

Friday, June 20, 2014

City of 500 Celebrates 5000 page municipal code: Tales From Normal, MN.: FICTION

Just got the tweet....the entire city of Normal, Mn. is celebrating next weekend....and they call it "Municipal Code Days"----even though Normal, Mn is a city of only 500 that remain year round, they tout a municipal code that totals 5000 pages, and normally there are two Harvard lawyers that are available on Skype that can help in the interpretation of it....Yes there has been no growth for the past 30 years...but still...the Code is something to be proud of...stay tuned as I follow this story.

Sunday, June 15, 2014

Politicians and TV Personalities sought to be "boots on the ground" in Iraq: Tales From Normal, Mn.: FICTION

Just got the tweet...and after a long day of coffee and political talk by the bass fishermen in Normal, Mn, they have reached a consensus that if all the TV political personalities and in fact all the politicians themselves would volunteer to be "boots on the ground" in Iraq...two very special things would result...we would have some peace here at home, and they would find some peace there...stay tuned..

Distinguished Church seeks alzheimer candidates for Leadership Opportunity: Tales From Normal, Mn.: FICTION

Just got the tweet...from the bass fishermen in Normal, Mn at Betty Lou's Coffee Shop....seems that the Church of The Perpetual Fisherman is seeking new applicants for their church leadership, and because they want to begin again, they felt that the candidates with the "cleanest slate" would be those with alzheimer's disease...or at least those who pledge to not remember anything that they are not supposed to remember...stay tuned as I follow this story.

Friday, June 13, 2014

"We're all car dealers now." Tales From Normal, Mn: FICTION

Just got the tweet from the boys at Betty Lou's Coffee Shop in Normal, Mn---seems that to a man this morning at coffee they all admitted that "we are all car dealers now."...in that every where you go, you hear the buzz,,,"well this item is very expensive, but you can lease it now for a monthly amount of $24...and with that comes the warranty that this is not a defective product, and that you will be satisfied...and the lease goes for 36 months unless you die, in which it is terminated....Whether it is cars, phones, appliances ...whatever....it just made me think....maybe I could lease my old 1996 Toyota Camry with 200000 miles on it...it might be too much for you to buy for cash, but you could lease it for 36 months....and the more I went over the sizzle of the sales presentation...the more I began to like the idea...stay tuned....

Friday, June 6, 2014

Excited to Exchange High Pay for Temp Work: Tales From Normal, Mn: FICTION

Just got the tweet this morning---seems Wall Street is pretty excited about the job numbers...they are up...because the folks that had lost their high paying jobs are now getting the opportunity to work temp jobs...and the number folks make NO distinction between the two sets of numbers...one has to wonder about that..I wonder if they are still working on an abacus...stay tuned...the bass fishermen just rolled their eyes when they listened to the news of the financial world...they knew better...they knew about the "bait and baloney spin." as they called it...

Wednesday, June 4, 2014

Financial Heavy Weights Summit will have keynote "Dance of the Money Changers" Tales From Normal, Mn. : FICTION

Just got the tweet...tomorrow at Betty Lou's Coffee Shop in Normal, Mn.,,,at a much heralded meeting of the very pinnacle of financial types from all over the world, who are bass fishing all day, but before that will conduct the urgent business of making serious comments about fiscal policy...well at this meeting, where form and tone is far more important that substance...and in fact this has been the dirty little secret about high level financial types the world over...at the very beginning...before even the introductions of the symposium speakers, there will be a short dance of the money changers...yes it looks like just a Hawaiian dance, but to some financial types it can have a deeper meaning...and well..we will just see what the stock market does with this ominous dance that will occur just before the markets open in New York on Thursday...stay tuned....no live video will be allowed, but I will do my best to convey the nuances of the dance....

Hedge Firm says "Losing" is the key learning Technique: Tales From Normal, Mn: FICTION

A hedge fund guru that was up in Normal, Mn. bass fishing last week sat down with the guys at Betty Lou's Coffee shop...he explained to the fully caffeinated group that losing money was the principal way that regular investors learned...and this really worked well.... since his hedge fund was short most stocks...when investors invested their hard earned cash and lost money, they learned, and at the same time the short hedge funds made tons of money...so a win-win....How sweet.... The guys just smiled...to a man they had given up the intangible investments years ago, and now preferred to invest in bait and gas for their boats...and ya...maybe a pontoon boat for the very successful type....stay tuned as I follow this story.

Tuesday, June 3, 2014

Cities claim "Cheaper Beer" could get our economy moving again: Tales From Normal, Mn.: FICTION

Just got the tweet from Normal, Mn. where the preparations are underway for the fourth of July ....and this year no stone is being left unturned to ensure that the locals will NOT run out of beer, and more importantly...cheap beer for the holidays...local police are bulking up on "warning" tickets, and smiley faces...and all over the Midwest folks are getting ready for the celebration that is the pinnacle of events for the year.

Everyone Leaving for Seattle: Tales From Normal, Mn.: FICTION

Just got the news...seems all buses and trains and planes are filled as citizens from Normal, Mn...and in fact the entire Midwest are leaving for Seattle...where they have passed a $15 minimum wage law....citizens are literally voting with their feet....

Folks buying Bigger Homes to fill them with...cobwebs: Tales From Normal, Mn.: FICTION

Just got the tweet...the local fishermen at Betty Lou's Coffee Shop in Normal, Mn. are talking this morning about the national news media story that the average new home is even bigger than in the past...because folks are demanding that it be so...and the assumption is that folks with cash want to fill these homes with more and more amenities...and furniture...because they are not filling them with kids....stay tuned....Realtors are silent as to whether any small homes are in demand..

Sunday, June 1, 2014

Some Concerned that Illegal Voting will be Curtailed: Tales From Normal, Mn.: FICTION

Just got the tweet from the local progressive political action committee, which meets every six months in Normal, Mn. at Betty Lou's Coffee Shop....and yesterday, in a short meeting, Louise, the chairperson, noted that with the decline in voting participation in Normal, Mn, which some have said approaches zero, there is a danger that if there is any curtailment or discouragement of illegals voting, there will be no votes to count period....and that the reputation of Normal, Mn. as a sound civic community might be in peril....one person in attendance did note that if there was better transportation options for the residents of the Our Lady of the Perpetual Fisherman Nursing Home this might increase the voting, with the warning that all of these residents needed to have their identification and proper documentation.