Tales From Normal, Mn.--FICTION

Tales from Normal, Mn. Headline News---FICTION

Friday, January 14, 2011

Boxing Lessons Totally Sold out in Normal, Mn. as Reporters begin training for fighting for the Open Meeting Law: Tales From Normal, Mn.: FICTION

Just got the text message from Normal, Mn. that all the boxing lessons for the next six months have been sold out in response to the news that a Madison, Wisconsin reporter was threatened by a state Assembly leader to a boxing match to decide an issue of the Open Meeting Law----seems that all the journalism staff and regular reporters for 100 miles have flocked to the boxing classes of Billy Bob's Black Belt Gym for the legendary Introduction to Boxing Course---

This famous Boxing Course specializes in the legendary Oriental moves in responding to sucker punches and taunting and other moxie moves. Stay tuned as I follow this story.

Friday, January 7, 2011

Legislators become Temporary LTE Contractors: Tales From Normal, Mn: FICTION

In a bold and stunning move, the governor of Normal, Mn has changed the job description of all legislators and made them independent agents or LTE contractors, and not elegible to receive pension benefits. They will of course receive their usual per diem expenses, but will receive $10 per hour salary. The governor by executive order made these changes so that the legislature might understand cost reduction in a special way, and more intensly identify with their consitutients. They will recieve no health care benefits, but will be elegible for medicaid benefits unless they decide to cancel those. Stay tuned.

Memories of Monticello and the Sacred Times of Jefferson Celebrated in Normal, Mn.

A celebration was held recently in Normal, Mn. formally recognizing the sacred traditions of "freedom" and the American Constitution during the times of Thomas Jefferson, a time when America was uncorrupted by loose interpretation of the Constitution, a time when men were men, a time when gentlemen were asked to vote as persons, and ladies and the hired help were not invited....ah those were the days of patriotism, days that the residents of Normal, Mn. yearned for, a time when there were only outhouses, and folks had a life expectancy of 50 at best. A time when health care was poor indeed, and if true patriots had their way today, we would return to....stay tuned.

"Predators Ball" Scheduled in Normal, Mn.: Tales From Normal, Mn:FICTION

The traditional "Predators Ball" will be held in Normal, Mn. on January 9th in the Daughters of the American Revolution dance hall, from 7pm to 11pm. This traditional event, formerly called the Inagural Ball, and before that in primative times called the "Pirates Ball" will feature the newly elected government officials that have been sworn in, as well as the other predators, namely gentlemen of the finest sort, namely professional gentlemen and ladies attired appropriately.

No costumes are necessary since the regular formal dress is suitable.