"Americans are excited about lower wages": Tales from Normal, Mn.: FICTION

Just got the text today from the fishing guys at Betty Lou's Cafe in Normal, Mn, that they are getting pretty excited about all the good news about America's corporate profits caused by lower wages driving stocks higher and higher....Even though as they stare at the giant tv's in the cafe in the morning, just past 6am is best for the best seating...and they just love it when the highly caffeinated guys on the morning stock tv shows talk about how the SandP keeps going higher and higher, and this seems to match the higher and higher they feel with the double strong caffeine plus the whipped cream that is no extra at Betty Lou's. It is kind of funny when one just ponders...none of the guys has any stocks...they just invest in minnows and bait for fishing walleyes...but still they are real positive about the future of America and all the great things that will hopefully come of all this greed, and the wonderful things that come of greed...at least the wonderful things they talk about on t.v.